When guys get nervous

I learned another lesson a couple weeks ago, that has seriously changed my perceptions of dating. I didn't realize that when a guy gets nervous it means he thinks you're really pretty! I just assumed the guy didn't have self confidence! It's amazing to me to see guys I thought were so tongue tied around me, become really great guys around the girls they end up marrying....hmmm...wow.

I've definitely started giving guys more of a chance, if they are nervous at first, to warm up a little more...gosh, I wish I would have known...oh well, I guess none of them were my beshert...

Cute Link - Figure out how much you weigh based on your daily activities....CUTE!!

http://www.blogthings.com/howmuchdoyouweighquiz/

New York Frum Events List!

Check out this new group. It's really great for finding all kinds of neat frum events in the New York area. www.groups.yahoo.com/group/nyfrumevents

Understanding other people's personalities

A friend told me about this really cool website called www.personalitypage.com that shows you information about your own and other people's personalities. It's neat learning about other people and how they work, why they do or don't do the things they do. Reading my own personality type was so validating. There were things I found it very hard to express to others and explain about the way I am, and reading it clear in black and white vindicated to me why I am the way I am...Enjoy!

HaRav Kaduri Mekubal

http://www.jewishpress.com/page.do/18292/Rav_Kadouri_Passes_Away_At_106.html

Really neat article to read about HaRav Kaduri. I didn't realize that he was sefardi and trained as a Chacham, which is really neat. I found the article an interesting context to place his life in. I heard Rabbi Kelleman at Neve Yerushalayim speak about a personal experience he had with Rav Kaduri and in general about mekubalim and how to approach the idea of them. His personal experience was kind of wacky, but amazing. It involved ridding a girl of a 'spirit' that was bothering her. I know, it sounds really wacky, but from what he said it made it sound like there are real spiritual things that can happen.

Other things I've heard of Rav Kaduri was how sensitive he was to the feelings of others, how deeply he cared. I'm not positive if this story was about him or Rav Auerbach, but the story goes that one of them had to pasken that a couple had to divorce. I don't remember all the details, maybe he had been a cohen and she a divorcee or convert. I really don't remember, but in either case they were very much in love. He paskened that they could not stay married, and then spent the WHOLE NIGHT crying over the pain of having to have had told them to end their relationship. I found that story very touching. Because sometimes you do have to do the right thing, and it is right, and G-d has His plan and we have to trust Him even when we don't understand it. But it's so painful to have to do the right thing sometimes. Especially when it means coming in between the love of two people who truly love one another. His crying and the extent of his crying, makes me respect his answer more too. Seeing how deeply he recognized and valued their love for one another is something that makes me respect him more.

The things I wish someone would have told me in Bais Yaakov

I'm thinking of writing a book about this....

I've been doing a lot of learning and want to share a few of the things with you on here...

The reality is, that I want to backtrack and change a little bit about some of the comments I made on this blog previously. I do still believe that at a certain age it should be accepted in the religious frum community for guys and girls to meet each other in natural ways, but I also want to write a little bit about some of the benefits of having a good shadchan, because I've had some good experiences with that lately...

I used to find it very frustrating to have someone else picking a person out for me to meet, but I've found that since people have contacts I don't have, sometimes this can be really good. Not every shadchan is good to go to. It's more about meeting someone we jive with and who understands who we are, and what we mean when we tell them what we need. Someone we can show the 'warts' and all to - or at least a few of them if not all ;).

I also learned something VERY useful from a guy I dated recently. He told me that guys get uncomfortable around girls and don't 'know what to do' in TWO situations.

1) Guy wants to end it or say something that will cause negative feelings in girl
2) Guy is very attracted to girl and wants to ask her out but is scared of being rejected because of how much he likes her.

ANY time a guy falls in these two categories, you are at risk for getting some mixed messages going on if he is too scared to get over his fear and face it with the courage to act.

I learned another thing from another guy...Guys like to be flirted with....Hmm...they never taught me that in Beis Yaakov.

But they also never taught me it was a GOOD thing to talk to a guy after the age of 18 or whenever I was serious about meeting people and finding someone to connect to and marry.

I DO see their point in some ways. When guys and girls just hang out as friends, the system doesn't seem to work. People are 'friends' with 'everyone' and there is no sense of loyalty and specialness that gets built. Noone is ever perfect, and when one person is not available, or interesting you can always turn to the next. Where one person's failings are, lie another person's strenghts. When one person is not looking so attractive, another person will be. People don't really bond with each other in the way they are meant to. I don't know why this phenominon seems to work differently in the non-Jewish world. Maybe it's because they touch, or maybe it's because there is less of a spiritual issue that is challenging them. Or maybe it is deceptively easier looking from the outside but not really so. I don't know. What I do know is that I believe that people are longing deep down inside to be together with another person in

Telling it like it is - some very insightful dating information

Nice guys and nice girls. Why doesn't he/she want to go out with me?

Some great articles to read.

www.niceguys.org

www.nicegirls.org

and some really good articles at www.nicecentral.org

Go check it out!

Revving Up For Another Kumsitz

The smell of kumsitz is in the air. It's coming, coming!

Wow, just had to go fun there for a second. Ahem --- excuse me :)

But really. People have been asking me about it, and I'm feeling excited about it. I already have a whole list of people looking forward. I was thinking of doing it ON Lag Ba'Omer for the end of the day and into the night, but I already have tentative plans, so it may not work. How funny, I think I had the same plans (in a very different form) last year.

I can hardly wait to listen to music again. I'm itching, thrashing inside. It's tugging at my insides a little, in need of a good soothing melody, especially because this is not the easiest time for me, in some significant ways.

But this is also a good time. Challenging. Oh boy challenging, but good too. Hoping for some more and more good to go with it.

BANG ON A CAN MARATHON

Saturday, June 2TBD - Sunday, June 3Winter Garden
MUSIC
River to River at the World Financial Center presents
BANG ON A CAN MARATHON20th ANNIVERSARY

In 1987, the first Bang on a Can Marathon in New York City exploded many of the myths surrounding contemporary music. This year we'll blow open the gates even further with a 26 hour round-the-clock super-mix of mind-boggling, genre-defying music by pioneering artists from around the globe. Bring your ears and come prepared to have a blast!KIDS CAN TOO!Sunday, June 2 :: 2pm :: Battery Park City Esplanade PlazaBring your kids, hang out along the river and hear an awesome set of fun and unusual music featuring Bang on a Can electric guitarist and instrument inventor Mark Stewart, the central Asian sound wizards Mashriq from Uzbekistan, Talujon Percussion Quartet and instruments you've never seen or heard before!

BANG ON A CAN MARATHONSaturday, June 2, 8pm-Sunday, June 3, 10pm :: Winter Garden26 hours of ear-twisting music featuring the following artists:

ComposersJohn Luther Adams, Louis Andriessen, Chris Adler, Derek Bermel, Jeffrey Brooks, Don Byron, Mary Ellen Childs, Mark Dancigers, Franco Donatoni, Brian no, John Fitz Rogers, David R. Gordon, Michael Gordon, Judd Greenstein, John King, Phil Kline, David Lang, David Longstreth, Alvin Lucier, Missy Mazzoli, Thurston Moore, Steve Reich, James Tenney, Matt Tierney, JG Thirlwell, Galina Ustvolskaya, Edgar Varese, Lois V Vierk, Julia Wolfe, Evan Ziporyn and more.PerformersBang on a Can All-Stars, Iva Bittová, Bagpipe Orchestra, Robert Black, Don Byron, The Clogs, Dälek, David Cossin, Dirty Projectors, Eighth Blackbird, Ethel, Dominic Frasca, Grand Valley State University New Music Ensemble, Michael Harrison, Hartt Bass Band, International Contemporary Ensemble (ICE), Vijay Iyer, Kyaw Kyaw Naing, Manorexia, Mashriq, Meehan/Perkins Duo, Patti Monson, Now Ensemble, Odd Appetite, Milind Raikar, Real Quiet, red fish blue fish, Steven Schick, Mark Stewart, Mike Svoboda , TACTUS, Talujon Percussion Quartet, World Saxophone Quartet, and more.FilmsBill Morrison and Matt Mullican

from: http://www.worldfinancialcenter.com/calendar/

Google This

This was forwarded to me by a friend.

Subject: Fw: Google this
Take 60 seconds to do this - it's worth the effort.
1. go to www.google.com
2. click on "maps"
3. click on "get directions"
4. type "New York" in the first box (the "from" box)
5. type "London" in the second box (the "to" box)(hit get directions)
6. scroll down to step #24

LOL!! :)

Healing Relationships

This website and semi-diary of healing and recovery is a 'must read' for anyone who wants to grow to love themself and develop healing relationships with others.

http://www.joy2meu.com/Relationship.html

Abuse in the Frum Community

I read some heartwrenching stories about this and might start a topic on this with articles, to provide more education.

Nice Guys - Why Do They End Last?

I read this excellent article. The name of the blog is not so much my taste, but I loved reading this article. It has so much insight, and gives me even some insight into myself and why being nice is sometimes not to my benefit...

Why "Nice Guys" are often such LOSERS

written by: http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/niceguys.shtml

You hear it all the time: "He was such a NICE Guy, and she's such a Heartless Bitch for dumping him."

I get letters from self-professed Nice Guys, complaining that women must WANT to be treated like shit, because THEY, the "Nice Guy" have failed repeatedly in relationships. This is akin to the false logic that "Whales are mammals. Whales live in the sea. Therefore, all mammals live in the sea."

If you have one bad relationship after another, the only common denominator is YOU. Think about it.

What's wrong with Nice Guys? The biggest problem is that most Nice Guys (tm) are hideously insecure. They are so anxious to be liked and loved that they do things for other people to gain acceptance and attention, rather than for the simply pleasure of giving. You never know if a Nice Guy really likes you for who you are, or if he has glommed onto you out of desperation because you actually paid some kind of attention to him.

Nice Guys exude insecurity -- a big red target for the predators of the world. There are women out there who are "users" -- just looking for a sucker to take advantage of. Users home-in on "Nice Guys", stroke their egos, take them for a ride, add a notch to their belts, and move on. It's no wonder so many Nice Guys complain about women being horrible, when the so often the kind of woman that gets attracted to them is the lowest form of life...

Self-confident, caring, decent-hearted women find "Nice Guys" to be too clingy, self-abasing, and insecure.

Nice Guys go overboard. They bring roses to a "lets get together for coffee" date. They try to buy her affections with presents and fancy things. They think they know about romance, but their timing is all wrong, and they either come-on too strong, too hard and too fast, OR, they are so shy and unassertive, that they hang around pretending to be "friends", in the hope that somehow, someway, they will get the courage up to ask her out for a "date".

They are so desperate to please that they put aside their own needs, and place the object of their desire on a pedestal. Instead of appreciating her, they worship her. We are only human, and pedestals are narrow, confining places to be -- not to mention the fact that we tend to fall off of them.

They cling to her, and want to be "one" with her for fear that if she is out of sight, she may disappear or become attracted to someone else. A Nice Guy often has trouble with emotional intimacy, because he believes that if she learns about the REAL person inside, she will no longer love him.

Nice Guys are always asking HER to make the decisions. They think it's being equitable, but it puts an unfair burden of responsibility on her, and gives him the opportunity to blame her if the decision was an unwise one.

Nice Guys rarely speak up when something bothers them, and rarely state clearly what it is they want, need and expect. They fear that any kind of conflict might spell the end of the relationship. Instead of comprimising and negotiating, they repeatedly "give in". When she doesn't appreciate their sacrifice, they will complain that, "Everything I did, I did for her.", as if this somehow elevates them to the status of martyrs. A woman doesn't want a martyr. She wants an equal, caring, adult partner.

Nice Guys think that they will never meet anyone as special as she is. They use their adoration as a foundation for claiming that "no one will ever love her as much as I do." Instead of being a profound statement of their devotion, this is a subtle, but nasty insult. It is akin to saying to her: "You are a difficult person, and only *I* can ever truly love you, so be thankful I'm here."

The nice guy -needs- to believe that he is the best person for the object of his desires, because otherwise his insecurities will overrun him with jealousies and fear. The truth of the matter is that there are many people out there who can be a good match for her. We rarely stop loving people we truly care about. Even if we no longer continue the relationship, the feelings will continue... But love isn't mutually exclusive. We can (and do) love many people in our lives, and romantic love is really no different. Though he may love her immensely, there will likely be other people who have loved her just as much in her past, and will love her just as much in the future. The irony of it all is: "Who would want to go out with someone who was inherintly unlovable anyways?"

More than loving the woman in his life, a Nice Guy NEEDS her. "She is my Life, my only source of happiness..." YECH! What kind of a burden is that to place on her? That SHE has to be responsible for YOUR happiness? Get a grip!

Another mistake Nice Guys make is to go after "hard luck" cases. They deliberately pick women with neuroses, problems, and personality disorders, because Nice Guys are "helpers". A Nice Guy thinks that by "helping" this woman, it will make him a better, more lovable person. He thinks it will give him a sense of accomplishment, and that she will appreciate and love him more, for all his efforts and sacrifice. He is usually disappointed by the results.

This ultimately boils down to the fact that Nice Guys don't like themselves. Is it any wonder women don't like them? In order to truly love someone else, you must first love yourself. Too often Nice Guys mistake obsession for "love".

Get this Guys: INSECURITY ISN'T SEXY. IT'S A TURNOFF.

You don't have to be an ego-inflated, arrogant jerk. You just have to LIKE yourself. You have to know what you want out of life, and go after it. Only then will you be attractive to the kind of woman with whom a long-term relationship is possible.

http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/niceguys.shtml

Introverts - Gaining Energy From Within

Here is an interesting article that was published on Frumster about being an introvert.

http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/200303/rauch

Controversial New Idea: Nerves Transmit Sound, Not Electricity

Article entitled "Controversial New Idea: Nerves Transmit Sound, Not Electricity"

http://www.livescience.com/humanbiology/070312_nerves_work.html

It's an interesting article, which says one underlying thing quite clearly. Scientific theories are guess work in the end of the day. They are ultimately fallible human beings, as we all are, who can say things with an air of authority, but it doesn't make what they say the truth. Don't get me wrong. Science has discovered some amazing things, and has done some wonderful things for the world. But ultimately in the end of the day, every profession is simply reflective of human beings trying to grasp and understand a world that is beyond our true understanding. We can only share our perceptions of the little grasps of what makes it work.

Knowing that, can let me sit back in amazement at the world. It is more complex than it may seem. And it's Creator is the only one who truly understands it's mysteries.

Humor - What Makes You Laugh?

I wrote the following to a friend who asked me to share more of my thoughts about humor. He liked it, so I'll share it with you. It's in his zechus that I wrote this post down finally.

Humor is something I have thought a lot about, and I wouldn't be able to put it all down into a few sentences, but will do my best.

I like humor that uplifts me, or is witty (makes me think about something on a deeper level), or brings up happy nostalgic thoughts. Basically, I like the type of humor that leaves me feeling happy. Making fun of someone doesn't make me feel happy. And I don't believe G-d would ever want me to do it.And the times it has, I've usually felt bad afterward. The focus is negative, not positive. It necessitates putting someone else down for me to feel higher and better. It necessitates hiding ones anger behind duplicitous meanings, which I don't like.

I say if someone is angry, to be straight out about it. I like things that are genuine and straight, not having to guess whether someone meant or didn't what they said, and why they would have said it if not.To me, it is an elemental form of giving another human being respect, that even if I dislike someone, I do not like them to be made fun of.

It's a "common" practice, but to me it shows a lack of moral integrity. I can't say I've never laughed when someone is made fun of, and there are rare occasions when I've enjoyed it (like the person did something very very evil, and it was kind of cathartic to laugh about it.) But just as a sport, I don't like it.

I also don't like when people act silly in that way...I like being silly, please don't get me wrong. Just something about the 'way' it is done sometimes shows a lack of 'valuing' oneself and others.I'm not sure whether you can relate to it, but that's my take on it...

Like, I'm really 'not' into Jim Carrey type of humor...

Thought for the day: Do the halachos of loshon horah apply any differently to humor?

Have a wonderful empowering day. Do something good the noone knows about. Empower your soul by growing closer to G-d.

Finding a Job

Well, after a few days of seriously working to get a business together, I officially realized why people do this while working, or when they have capital backing them up. It takes time to build up a business and it's a good thing to have income in the meantime. (It takes capital too.) I am not the first person to try this and 'see for myself' and I'm sure I won't be the last. But let this be an advisory to any of you out there who have decided to get off the rat race and build something for yourself...

And have a great day!

And pray that G-d sends me something wonderful soon, and that I have the patience to trust Him until it comes!

Change

Change. Love the new face lift this template has got?

You get to vote. I'd love to hear your thoughts.

:)

Purim is on it's way...

And I went to NY Costumes on 11th and Broadway (on the East side, because Broadway cuts over), and bought me-self a costume :). It was really neat to go there, I enjoyed seeing the many different types of costumes, they had gypsy headresses, beer mugs for caps, masks, wigs, superman costumes, nurse, and all kinds of characters. I didn't have the time to really indulge as much as I'd have liked to, but it was fun.

I'm also in the process of setting up my mishloach manos for friends. I'm giving them a somewhat healthy variation of it. I'm sure they'll get enough of the other stuff as it is...so might as well add some good old healthy things like orange juice and raisins. I did get them some chocolate though...you know....and then there's mike and ikes and cookies...and I'm deciding what else to put in there. I plan to do some more shopping tomorrow...

I'm Back...Just a little bit

I've started out on my own doing online marketing and web branding analysis. Have opened up shop..kind of. So, please excuse my absences, dear readers. I have not meant to ignore you. I have been extremely occupied in trying to build up the beginnings of my own new company :). Wish me success...

Martin Luther King - Let Freedom Ring

A few weeks ago, I took out some DVD's from the public library. One of them was the story of Rosa Parks and Martin Luther King. I didn't watch it right away, and ended up watching it about a night before "Martin Luther King Day"by accident - not that I believe in a day like that, but I do have to say that I am quite impressed by him.

I must also say how shocked I was to learn again as an adult what happened to the blacks in this country only about 50 years ago! It is SHOCKING to think that some of our citizens were treated so horribly, and denied their rights in a country that proclaims to give freedom to it's citizens.

But it also puts a lot into perspective for me. For a while I have not understood the hatred that many blacks have for other groups, or why they are given preferential treatment in ways that seem at times to be "reverse racism", whereby a white person might not get a job or opportunity (college, etc...) simply because they are white! The world seemed so off kilter. Where was justice? And why would a white person be looked down on or excluded from black circles today? Why, I wondered was everyone harping on a subject that seemed to me to be clearly over?

Well, just imagine Jews living in Germany...To know that these people tormented you, that their grandfathers killed yours, and tortured yours. I am not equating the 2 situations, because they are very different on many many levels....but it did explain to me the feelings that some people are holding onto.

It gives me at least more compassion and understanding from where they are coming from, rather than seeing just how wrong they are. Yes, I do believe they are wrong (especially towards me, because my grandparents did no wrong to them), but 50 years is not that long, and it makes sense that there are some repercussions reverberating around today from the wrongs done to the past generation....These are some of the consequences.

I don't think they are being handled correctly, or all that well per say on either side, but it is what it is...I think a lot more understanding could be promoted on both sides, and both sides need to move on and promote healthy self respect and respect for others. I'm sure the damages done to the black community are STILL having their ripple effect in today's world, and am also sure that the white community has tried to do things to correct it. I think most importantly there needs to be an apology and worldwide recognition for how wrongly they have been treated.

It also explains a lot to me about other issues and social problems of the day. To watch that movie and see how insane an entire culture can be, (and not in relation to any issue directly affecting me) helped me see how truly insane and off kilter and out of balance society's can be, and so when things are accepted as a 'given' today, they may actually not be. And to see it and say something about it, while it might meet with tremendous opposition at first, may in fact be bringing healing and truth to the world. Sometimes. Sometimes not.

The first place to start is the workplace in America, and how the 'worker' is treated...I beleive there are major corrections that need to be done in this area. Another is relationships. Another is morality.

:)

Being on the Outside Looking In

And the inside looking out, like an actor who has to both live the part and be beyond it and true to him'self' is what we have to be doing in this world. Like Kirk Douglas described, per Rabbi David Aaron from Isralight.

He talked about the importance and necessity of being both in and out of a relationship at the same time to gain perspective. To be both within this world and above the personality, charachter, role you were given to play in this lifetime, seeking deeper within yourself to the soul and ultimately to know yourself, the deep spark within you that is like a "Ray of G-d." That is a part of seeking G-d in the world. He's not just 'somewhere out there'. He is deep within your core, your soul.

He said: Relationships should not be based on just the character, etc. they must be 'soul mates', reach above. We can't look "skin deep", we must look deeper to the soul. Ultimately, even a person who feels like a soul mate will be extremely different from us, because we are all entirely different and unique people, as similar as we may start out thinking we are...

Then, I went to the Carlebach Shul for a seminar on "Frum Jews Who Rebel", and there was a speaker there named Rabbi Russel who brought across the idea that - Every person comes to this world to do a tikkun, therefore inherently there must be something wrong with every person you will ever meet. And that is the gift. The challenge, and the hardest part of that person, is the place that challenges you to most love them, to seek to understand them, to understand what pains them. The struggle and the challenges we face in dealing within ourselves in connection to others is what brings us to grow in this life, and that is really what life is about.

Rabbi Schoenfeld (?) who runs the Thursday night chulent "get togethers" in midtown (they are vegetarian for any of you out there :)) also seemed compassionate to the importance of the process of asking questions honestly. He said that the struggle is what it's about.

Tonight at the Carlebach Shul

Rabbi Citron is speaking tonight at the Carlebach shul, teaching from Likutei Mohoran by Rebbe Nachman of Breslov. The lecture is called for 8 pm.

See you there? :)

Isralight Rabbinic Internships 2007 Apply Now!

Fw: Isralight Summer Rabbinic Internships 2007 Apply Now!
Posted by: "lmechanick@aol.com" lmechanick@aol.com

Isralight Summer Rabbinic Internships 2007

June 18th - July 3rd , 2007

Isralight is happy to announce our Summer Rabbinic Internships to be held in Jeursalem from June 18th - July 3rd , 2007. The Isralight Rabbinic Internships will offer a hand-picked group of rabbinical students an opportunity to study, explore, and hone their skills at the Isralight Institute in the Old City of Jerusalem. Room, board (including most meals), materials and ground transportation will be fully subsidized for program participants. Select interns may be offered continued internships and additional on-going field work at Isralight programs in North America. The Isralight Summer Rabbinic Internships will train future rabbinic leaders in innovative and effective ways to communicate in a compelling and inspiring manner.

Additionally, it will expose participants to many of the fundamental texts that form the basis of Isralight's all-embracing educational philosophy and approach. Program Highlights * Interns will engage in guided think-tank sessions addressing challenging issues that contemporary Jewish leaders must face.

* Seminars will enhance skill in communication, oration, and informal counseling, honing participants' talents and abilities. Participants will have ample opportunities for practical hands-on informal hadracha (counseling and teaching) with Jewish adults from diverse backgrounds at the Isralight Institute program, and will receive constructive analysis and feedback.

* Interns will explore many of the essential writings of Rabbi Abraham Isaac Kook, Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik, and other giants of Jewish thought under the tutelage of Isralight teachers.

* Participants will be provided with unique trips and tours in Israel , demonstrating the Jewish homeland's viability to be a vibrant classroom without walls .

For more information or to apply to the Isralight Summer Rabbinic Internships program, please submit your resume together with cover letter to Rabbi Sam Shor, Isralight's Director of Community and Leadership Development via email _sam@isralight .org _ (mailto:sam@isralight. org) or fax to 212-947-4998 .

Only applicants who submit both a cover letter and resume will be considered.

Note: If I could do it, I think I would! ;)

Life Lessons

Some interesting lessons I've learned and/or been reminded of lately are:

1) Sometimes an extreme example of something in life, teaches us to grow in the same but lesser way and is a gift.

Looking at someting outside of ourselves, where another person overreacts to something (from our perspective) and it seems clear that their reaction is exaggerated from what should be from the situation) gives us the opportunity to look at our own lives and see if we are in fact making similar mistakes. Finding these mistakes can be such a gift, because having honest clarity and perspective on our lives gives us the chance to make real changes, that make our lives better.

Similar maybe to when Dovid Hamelech was asked to judge a situation by Hashem, and though the particulars of it were different, he was in fact passing the judgement that would stick to him. He was being judged based on his own value system, (possibly similar to the Shevatim when Yosef gave them tochacha - Ha'od Avi Chai? You said how much you cared about my father, and didn't want him to die from losing a loved son - what about what happened with me? - Shevatim aspect is based on a Devar Torah given by a friend of mine on Shabbos named Talya - am not sure what her source is though)

Another nice life lesson:

2) People give us gifts, not always the ones we want, they don't always show they care in the way we might wish they did, but if make the decision to take notice of the ways that they do in fact show up for us in the relationship, and remember the wonderful things they've done for us, when they don't come through in some other way, we may find there is more love coming at us than we quite realized :).

3) Life without focusing on growing spiritually is dry and stagnant. Are you stagnating and bored? There might be a reason why. Other things do not provide long lasting fulfillment...Growing does.

4) Just a reminder for a plug to read Chovos Halevovos...maybe I should start posting from it on here. It would give me a reminder to read it, and a sense of meaning and purpose to share it with others...Just an idea....Guess we'll see what happens with it.

5) Teshuva is a process. We can't expect it to happen in a day. (from a friend - Thanks, Friend :)) But be lighted (lit?) on fire searching for it. Not travelling forward is travelling backward, unless your process is different...